Thursday, April 29, 2010

Legend of Becky's Aneurysm

Okay, listen. I have already written a mile-long post about how Legend of the Seeker is an awful awful show, but I can't stop watching because, I dunno, I like rage. BUT NOW THEY ARE JUST TOYING WITH ME. I feel sorry for the sold-out soulless writer that has to come into pitch meetings (er whatever) and have some 5-Hour-Energy-upped producer tell them who has been well established as many years dead and will be making an appearance this episode.

I have completed 2 writing workshops and I have a grasp of what a storyline means and someone over there at the WB does NOT. Someone somewhere is writing for LotS and crying themselves to sleep every night after it's aired. Someone somewhere is coughing while they say who they write for. Every minutely interesting character they introduce gets killed before the end credits, and every seemingly challenging plot twist gets unwound for them happenstancially and any remotely difficult choice they have make gets, again totally without their input, almost instantly made for them THANK GOODNESS. There is no character development among the main characters for these reasons. None. Even my favorite character, Cara, who is for all intents and purposes the voice of The Viewing Audience makes her points of contention several episodes after America has been wondering the same thing and goes along with whatever Richard, or Zed, or Kahlan who she doesn't even like says anyway.

Empty threat warning: if the next episode is as bad as this one, Seeker will have finally lost me and that means that even the ironic viewers will have abandoned them before the season finale. On my half-pipe of awfulness, it will have cruised past "So Bad It's Good" and gone straight for "I Honestly Can No Longer Bring Myself to Spend My Time This Way.

The whole world is drunkytown right now. Blackout Thursday and all. Last day of classes. *sigh* I have work tomorrow though. $10/hour to pull curtains. Not too shabby.
Speaking of work, I did NOT sort screws today, I instead added a marketable skill to my repertoire and that is staining wood like nobody's business. Score.


Al Fakher - Grape With Mint Flavor
In the box: Smells very sweet. Very sticky. Cut is virtually H-H caliber but the molasses is so abundant and so sticky that it's prone to clumping and could be an uneven burning hazard if you don't aerate it at any time.
In the bowl: Buh! Delicious! Deeeliiiiciooouus. Very sweet, kind of sour, smell stays intense through smoking. I did not think mint would go with grape at all, but it does and it has a cool flavor that really compliments the fruityness. It's not a mild or possibly fermented grape like White Grape is, it's very intense. Well, it's candy-ish frankly and that's bound to turn off some die-hard, in-it-for-the-tobacco people. Fair enough. But if your shisha drawer reminds you of Gumdrop Pass like mine does, Grape with Mint Flavor will feel right at home, and your hookah will be a happy one. I make another advisement to turn or aerate your bowl after your coals have made a pass around. There is viable shisha under there, y'all! I'm never in it for no 45-minute session. My hookah nights are 2 hours or more. Coals I'll go through a million of, but I'm pretty stingy with my tobacco. I take it as far as it will go, to say the least.
star star star star star
Al Fakher Grape with Mint Flavor: 4.75/5 stars.
If you want to be smoking a cigarette and all you have is a hookah, this is not what you pack. But I'll be damned if it's not one of the tastiest ones I've had.

Good job, self

I've been a pretty decent absentee blogger lately. When I logged in today I even found a half-finished draft titled "Straight-to-the-Internet Post." HILARIOUS IRONY. Hilarirony.

and I will be spending exponentially more time on the internet starting tonight after my dance show. That will be a video I can hopefully post!

Meanwhile, my foster dogs, who are totally lesbionic for each other, have stopped wrestling and are now currently on top of each other/the couch and silently biting at each others' open mouths. I didn't even think animals without lips could make out. I'm third-wheeling the hell out of this living room right now.

See you all tonight with the first actual shisha review in, what, months?
I have to go sort screws or something equivalently mundane at my drama dept. job, where I'm normally put to use playing with saws and telling other people how they are building it wrong. *gasp* A DOWNSIDE to the end of the academic year! Oh, Pessimism, I knew I could count on you.

Also, I applied to be a contributor to the website of the previously-extolled nerd, bloggist, and purveyor of sexytimes Chris Hardwick. was once just a blog and will now soon be a blogging empire, the likes of which I would happily build pyramids for until the end of my malnourished, overworked days.
Wish me luck! Or, quite possibly, HI CHRIS.